I find myself sitting here wondering “What the is the best way to start this post?”. I might as well just get to the point, I’ve had a couple of “blah” days and yesterday I went AWOL, basically I vanished from the blog and twitter. What do I mean by blah? I need a more intelligent word for it, if you think of one let me know! I mean a day when you can’t get motivated, feel lethargic and the whole day passes you by. Suddenly its evening and all you have accomplished is watching hours of daytime TV and reading a big chunk of your new book. That in itself isn’t so bad but when you have been unable to shake the lethargic and slightly gloomy mood that you woke up with, it feels like nothing has been accomplished. What is making me feel like this? I wish I could answer that but I can’t put my finger on it. Today I have felt more upbeat, I went shopping with my mam and had coffee and I feel more “myself”.
The more pressing matter though is that I owe a lot of people an apology. On Twitter on Thursday I said that I was having a “blah” day and didn’t feel myself. I then disappeared without explanation on Friday… I really didn’t think that through! I know that a couple of people were wondering if I was ok and I cannot apologize enough! I should have posted a message saying I was having an offline day and I will do that in the future. I have met some wonderful people through Twitter and if it had been the other way around I would have wondered if they were ok, if they had been taken ill or if they had just taken a break to clear their head. I will be keeping an eye on my “blah” days in the future and will be talking it through with my therapist when I next see him, as I haven’t felt like that before. My anxiety normally makes me feel tense or nervous on my bad days but yesterday I just felt… empty. Like my brain was a laptop and I had pressed the “delete all” button.
So to finish I just want to say a huge THANK YOU to everyone who is reading this, thank you for taking a moment to read my ramblings.
And to the people on Twitter, particularly @FindPositives and @vickymummyrc, thank you for caring and hope you both recover from your colds very soon!